For Over 30 Years, Long Island's Leading Organization Dedicated to Preventing Bullying and Child Abuse

Who are the Bullies

At sometime or another, we all have encountered a mean kid who says something that hurts our feelings.  Is that kid a bully?  Well it depends.

A bully doesn’t know when to stop.  He or she hurts someone over and over again and knows he or she is inflicting pain on another.  A bully intends to hurt another and has usually established a pattern of hurtful behavior. A bully can be big or small, a boy or a girl, have good or bad grades in school and can be older or younger than you.  However, there are some things that most bullies have in common.  Bullies:

  • like to have power and control over others
  • think they should always win
  • think they should always get what they want
  • intend to humiliate others
  • lack empathy
  • are very comfortable with their behavior and feel pretty good about themselves

Did you know that today’s bullies are often popular, have many friends, are in the “in crowd,” are often high achievers, socially and academically. They are hard to identify because they enjoy high social status and may even be perceived to be school leaders.  This really complicates things because their peers won’t report their aggressive behavior; by doing so it would undermine their ability to be part of the popular group. These bullies use their power and social status to control the school’s social scene.